The girl went through this phase back in Jersey where she would wait until her brother and baby sister were put to bed, and then she would all of a sudden “need” stuff. “I need water,” or “I’m hungry. I want to eeeeeeat!” She’d tiptoe her way down the steps, and hop into the living room with a “Ta-Da!” kinda feel, and wait to be paid attention to. It was endearing in its own way, if somewhat of a challenge to the wife and I ever completely watching a movie. It was clear that she wanted to spend a little time being the only kid in the room, and it’s hard to argue with that logic. For the most part, all three kids are together all the time. The bear got a little solo time when we were in Gymboree, and during her swim lessons. The twins are actually pretty good at being in the same space, and doing different things, like at some of our playgroup type activities. But in all, we are all together. A lot. And sometimes it must get to be a bit much. For all of us.
So, back in Jersey, we started calling her the “littlest houseguest.” I’m not really sure why, but it made me laugh, so it stuck. I bring this up today, as she seems to be making a return engagement over the last week or so. Once the other two are nestled snug in their beds…out she comes. Whether its “I want my light on,” or “I wanna play Chutes and Ladders,” it’s clear she’s not ready to go to sleep, and wants to be attended to, as one would attend a houseguest.
Her requests are reasonable, mostly, but its more the timing of it all: she’s seeming to burst with energy when the rest of us are just about tapped out. I’m not sure where she gets it from, as on average, she sleeps less than her brother and sister. Her brother is very easy to get to bed these days-he likes to sleep, and when he’s tired, he’ll pretty much put himself in bed. The bear is pretty easy, unless her teeth are bothering her, and since she seems to have been cutting teeth like a Great White the last few months, there have been days of challenge, but in general, she’ll go down to sleep when asked. But big sister? Only when she’s either good and ready, or she simply drops. Not a lot of bargaining…last night for example…there was a need to, once the other two were down, eat more noodles, drink water, discuss why it gets dark outside, look at her globe and ask the names on every island on it, and where all our family and friends live, read some books, play a few rousing games of “Dora Chutes and Ladders” (Dora won) with me, and then she wanted to play a few rounds by herself, telling her dead old dad to “Leave me alone now Daddy.”
She feel asleep soon after I left her alone. She woke up early today, although it was after the other two had gotten up, and first thing was, “I’ve got the box-time to play Dora.”
She’s consistent. It does serve as a reminder that we do need to try and make time to do things with the kids one on one. All of the kids benefit when we get the chance to do such things, and although logistically, it is a real challenge at times, especially with only the one car, they are different kids when we can do things one on one. Every time the boy sees a bus, he says, “That’s the bus we took to Aloha Stadium, Daddy.” Any time the girl sees a movie poster, she talks about how Mommy took her to see “Enchanted” and they got candy and popcorn. The wife has talked about how different the bear was when she flew back to the mainland with her alone. She seems to get the short end of things, as the youngest, but that will likely ease once the twins start their new preschool program in August. Two days a week, three hours a day. They need to go. I need them to go. The bear will then get some much needed solo time, and obviously the twins are ready to have some structure without me and the wife there. Some of their friends from swim class are in the same program, so there is real potential for all of us both academically and socially. Apparently, I’ve been signed up already to be a classroom parent helper. My triumphant return to education, indeed…
It seems simple, but between our work schedules and everything else, its been a real challenge, but if the “littlest houseguest” has shown me anything this week, it’s that you need to make the time, even when you’re tired, to give the members of your family what they need. Even if it’s a discussion of how the Earth’s rotation causes it to get dark, and how it’s a different time in Iraq, where her Uncle is, and another time on the Mainland, where her Aunts are. Despite being tired, I figure I’ve got to enjoy this time when they want to be around us. They’ve grown so much in the last few years already-hard to believe that someday they’ll be teenagers…who might not want to do quite so much together, with Dad…
So, I’m going to try to get to bed earlier from now on. Might mean it takes me a little longer to get through movies and stuff, and it might mean that some of my projects have to take a backseat. But I think I should take advantage of when they want to be with me, even if it’s a little past bedtime.
That and they keep waking up so darn early…I’m tired.
On another note, my old school had their graduation last week. If we had not moved, this would have been a fun yet stressful couple of weeks. The coming weeks would likely have been heavily stressful, or not stressful at all, depending on a few circumstances I won’t go into here. Needless to say, I’m not sad to be missing that level of stress. There are a lot of “What if’s” to consider there, but in all honesty, I imagine that my career would very likely be in flux right now. I am happier having walked away on my own terms.
Father’s Day involved breakfast at Denny’s, and then after dropping the wife off at work, I took the kids to the Zoo for the day.
Potty training continues. There are occasional accidents, but we are becoming more mobile by the day. I think we will be in fine shape by the time we are heading to preschool in August. It’s been frustrating at times, and there are days that if I had heard the word “potty” one more time, I think I would have totally lost it. It’s a lot of stress on them I’m sure, being such a big change, but they are getting there. I think starting in the new school will be a big deal for them, and I think we are all looking forward to it.
This one rambled a bit, but that’s what I get for trying to wax poetic while the kids are afoot. As always, comments welcome.
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