We’ve been here just under three months. There have been good days, and there have been some tough days, but overall, there have been a lot of days. The transition to life here has been rough at times, as I’ve written about in this space before. My transition to being a stay at home dad has been rough at times, and great at times, as I’ve also covered pretty well here.
To think about the fact that we have been in Hawaii 79 days is somewhat bewildering. To think about the fact that over a month of that time was spent in a drafty 2 bedroom apartment in Honolulu, and that we have not yet been in our home for 50 days is staggering. It feels like we have been here a year.
I don’t mention that fact to imply either a positive or a negative feeling: it is simply surprising to realize how little time we have in fact been here. In many ways, adjusting to life here has been a full-time job in itself, in addition to every other change we’ve gone through. Although Hawaii is a state in the Union, it does at times feel like we have moved to another country. Or planet.
But, I mention the above only in relation to the fact that when I get the chance to focus on some of the reasons we came here, as I did today, it becomes clear to me that no matter how difficult it can be at times, when it’s good, it’s really good.
The kids have adjusted better than I could ever have asked for, though truth be told, they are still 3 and 1 years old. Such ages do apparently come with unique and fun developmental accoutrements, such as the twins feeding off each other and running amok in their Gymboree class, or the baby deciding that she has to stand on the table during dinner and pick at the twins food. These are things that had been, and would have been challenges back in Jersey, but I would have been too busy doing my old job to have participated much in any of that. But truth be told, it has become clear that the twins may need to start doing some activities separately. And that presents a challenge, managing all three of them separately, and Gymboree, as great as it has been, may not be the answer as we look to have the kids into some other things on their own. (plus, it is rather pricy, truth be told) It may be that we stay with them, but we’ve been exploring other options.
Today, the wife took the twins to a Cooperative playgroup/pre-pre school sort of program that is connected with the Armed Services YMCA. I was at swim lessons with the baby. They run three days a week for an hour and a half. It had been free, but this March, it will start to incur a fee of one dollar per kid, per session. That will add up to around $36 a month for all three. The program has areas that the kids can do things on their own, or together, and there are other kids of comparable ages and levels, and its simply a bit more free-form, considering where our kids are in their “group activity participation” development. There is some cooperative stuff and teacher-led stuff towards the end, after they’ve had a chance to run amok for a while.
Long and rambling story short, they loved it, and we will be going back tomorrow. Gymboree, which saved my life when we first got here, may be on the way out. We may reconnect with them in the summer, when I assume this program is off, as it’s held in a school, but today, with that program as the day-starter led to one of the better days we’ve had since we’ve been here.
After the class, we came home, had a snack, took the wife to work, went by the post office for some business there, picked up lunch, stopped by Pearl Harbor to walk around the free exhibits there, went to open play at Gymboree, (we are paid up thru the middle of March…) and came home.
Side note about the trip to Pearl Harbor. We pass by the site several times a week, and I’ve taken the boy to tour the USS Missouri, which was a lot of fun. I don’t think they are quite ready for the boat trip to the Arizona yet, as it’s a very solemn site, and I would hate for a meltdown to disturb the event. We will take them at some point. We looked a number of exhibits, and there was a lot to see that is free. We went through the gift shop and the boy insisted on telling everyone what Daddy’s rule for the shop was: “Don’t touch anything.” which got quite a few chuckles.
There is an area near the USS Bowfin Submarine (which I’ve not yet toured…next one to visit us here gets to go…nudge nudge) where all of the ships that were involved in the initial attack on Pearl have a small stone that recounts their role in the action, and their hands lost. It was fascinating, and it was a good opportunity to talk to the kids about what a memorial is, and why we don’t climb on them or run around them. They listened, and followed directions and for a stop that I’d not planned, it made for a really, really good part of the day. Oh, and did you know that Elvis helped to fund the USS Arizona memorial?
Gymboree open play was fun as always. Quiet time was brief. Dinner was barely touched (the girl ate a bunch of noodles, but they had a decent lunch) and they were in bed by 7:30. The twins have taken to reading or playing a bit before they either fall asleep in action, or, they put out their light and go to sleep. They are growing. If you listen to music, try to get a copy of Trace Atkins "You're gonna miss this." I heard it last night in the car, and it's really a song that rings true on my better days, and I have to remind myself of it on our rougher ones.
It was a good day, and I think this new morning program could be a real positive for us all, as it just seemed like the right balance of structure and fun to set them up for the rest of the day. Guess we will find out tomorrow, but one of the main reasons we came here today was for more time together and if today is any indication, when it’s good, it’s really going to be good. I can only imagine what it might be like when I really get a handle on what the heck I’m doing…
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