What do you do when you like to do everything?

Being a stay at home parent has its joys and challenges, as I’ve discussed ad nauseum in this space to date. That is not the topic of today’s discussion.

I will not admit to having a plethora of free time, but I will say that the wife and I have done very well of late in trying to give one another time to do things for ourselves when we have the chance to do so. Days off together have been great, and as I’ve discussed, is a new concept to us, as even before we were married, we shared common days off very rarely. Now that I am home with the kids, we have more opportunities to do things together, and separately, both of which I think are necessary to be healthy and happy. But with that, comes a dilemma, and that is what I want to discuss today.

I have been both blessed and cursed with an insatiable desire to do everything. Doing said things well has never been a requirement, as evidenced by my parents tortuous experiences watching me play CYO basketball in Junior High, and my brief “knitting” stage where I endeavored to knit a Christmas scarf for my High School Girlfriend, who was Jewish. (My knitting sucked, and it later became a dust rag, and the holiday gift became a mediocre Calligraphy rendering of her favorite poem from Edgar Lee Masters Spoon River Anthology. Perhaps I should have stuck with basketball?)

I have spent various levels of time in my life engaged in the following:
Participating in the study of/training towards, with intent to pursue a potential career in the following: Vocal Music, Music History, Instrumental Music (piano, guitar, bass, tuba, trombone, drums, and a great night in Oberlin where I was taught to play the Dulcimer-long story), Music composition and theory, Astronomy, Physics, Black Studies, Archeology, Anthropology (wow, was that a rough two days), Education, Psychology, Religion and Spirituality including: Catholicism, Protestantism, Buddhism, Islam, Taoism, and a brief foray into Quakerism (they were awfully nice people, but if you know me, you know I can’t be quiet that long), Restaurant management, Acting, Theater Management, Lighting and stage design. I also considered but did not then pursue careers in the U.S. Coast Guard, Stained Glass Art, Dentistry, photography, working for UPS, and entering politics. There was also that period that I wished I could go back in time and work with Dogs, but I blame Gracie for that one.

I have participated in the following organized sports/activities/hobbies /interests/obsessions: Literature, Dinosaurs, theater (dramatic, comedic AND musical) swimming (both instructive and competitive), martial arts (Gun Yuk Do and another form), crew, soccer, baseball, basketball, volleyball, Water Polo (Garden State Games silver Medalist, scoring two goals…), Knitting (see above), pinochle, Euchre, Dance, Poker, the Physics Club, the HHS Black Awareness Forum, Also, Rap Music (RUN DMC were the bomb, yo) Dungeons and Dragons, I was President of my Junior Class, and was voted most Musical in the Senior yearbook. I was into Computer gaming, Wrestling (pro…yes, I still watch it too), Science Fiction, architecture, Egypt, Bruno Richard Hauptman, (My sister’s obsession), Thoreau (went to Walden too!), Model UN (won an award in College-woot!), Amnesty International, the SPS “Kool and the Gang” Fan Club (it was me and the Baptist Kid), Golf, Floor hockey, 18th Century Church Windows (it was about a girl), and painting and pastels (that was about a lot of girls). I’ve always loved to write as well. Both for school and for myself.

I have held the following jobs in my life: Landscaper, dishwasher, counter-boy/hoagie maker, dishwasher/pastry guy, “Chicken Holiday” whipping boy (that was a rough two Saturdays), tour guide, garbage man, mailman, Upscale deli Sandwich boy and Beer expert, landscaper again, freelance moving guy (moved the same iron piano twice…), valet, bellhop, Police Animal control Officer, bartender, coach, dorm parent, Artistic Director of a theater, bartender, bouncer, Concert Security (I handled “The Bob’s” and “The Tannahill Weavers); Assistant, then Associate, then Head Dean of Students at a private school, assistant coach, Teacher of: English, Spanish (badly), Theater Arts, the History of Jazz, Public Speaking, and ESL. I have been an Assistant Principal in both High Schools and Middle Schools, have been a High School Athletic Director, waited tables at both a five-star restaurant and an Irish Pub in NJ. I also worked at a Barnes and Nobles one summer.

Now, the above listing is not about showing how broad I am or anything other than an attempt to illustrate to myself if no one else, that my interests, for better or worse, have been well-explored and enjoyed. I do not regret any of those choices, (the knitting thing I’d love to revisit) but I’m left to wonder if perhaps such a broad range of interests is indicative of perhaps not only an active mind, but a restless one as well.

I am in a unique position here in Hawaii. While I hope to pick up a part time position somewhere to bring in a little extra cash, my primary job is and will remain caring for and teaching my children. But, the pacing of life here, and the rhythm that we are developing for our lives seems like it will allow some level of opportunity for exploration of some of my interests over the time that we are here, which will have an end as much as it had a start.

So, what do I do with the time I will have, which while it will not be much, will be mine? Do I get back to work on that book of short stories I’ve been working on for the last few years? Or do I put some work into that novel I was working on? Do I pull out my guitar and get back to performing? (It's been 15 years since "In My Nature.) I’ve got a load of material since I was last recorded and was actively performing. Do I explore something new? I’ve got the chance to catch on as a volunteer with the local Independent Wrestling company-that could be fun. Do I learn to do Island Canoeing? Take up Fishing or actually learn to surf on a board?

I won’t be so grandiose as to say that this is some kind of crossroads, because I do not think I see it that way. But, I have the opportunity to take some of the energy left from caring for the kids and put it towards something else, other than a professional career-it would seem irresponsible to not figure out something productive to do in addition to what I’m doing already.
But in a life that’s had so many interests, with such varied results, what does one focus on? That’s what I’m thinking about today. Recommendations welcome, although any suggestions that I learn to knit or finally learn the words to “American Pie” will be deleted immediately. Happy Valentines Day this week, and Happy Birthday to Gramma.